Chris Sims on Heavy.com has a weekly column where he reviews a one star movie from Netflix. This week he suffers through the 1.9 star A Christmas Too Many (Netflix link).
It's the kind of movie where you can tell every scene was done in exactly one take, not because they nailed it (the best actor in the movie is Clint Howard as an amazingly terrible gay stereotype), but because of the inescapable air of "screw it" that stays on the screen for the whole 90 minutes. It centers on a family that are less characters and more one-dimensiona setups for punchlines that never come: A survivalist father, an alcolholic mother, his vegan son and busty daughter, busty daughter's hapless boyfriend (who also shares an Executive Producer credit in yet another example of WON's Warning Sign #1), a vain aunt and her drug-addled football player husband, Sonny (who is undefined and, unlike the rest of the family, inexplicably Italian), and two has-been film star grandparents, who—in what might be WON's first example of cinema verite—are actually played by two has-been film stars.
What is the worst movie you've rented from Netflix?
I don't understand, what is a "one star movie"? Is there some place I can see the average rating of a movie, instead of just what Netflix thinks I will rate it?
Posted by: cavale | December 14, 2009 at 05:11 AM
uh... yeah.
on the movie page look at the line right below "Our best guess for..." where it says "average of ##### ratings"
Posted by: Tom | December 14, 2009 at 11:38 AM
that review could be reused for "Zack and Miri Make a Porno" with only a few cosmetic tweaks
Posted by: Pollardito | December 14, 2009 at 01:35 PM
The Room! hahaaa. a must see
Posted by: twitter.com/wizzack | December 14, 2009 at 05:06 PM
Timeline.
Posted by: TulsaTV | December 14, 2009 at 06:27 PM
Gerry.
We reserve One Star for the truly painful -- only 5 of 745 ratings on our Netflix account. The others being:
Pearl Harbor
Alfie
The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou
Zack and Miri Make a Porno [and I consider myself a Kevin Smith fan, though in retrospect maybe I could muster two stars for it]
Posted by: Bill | December 14, 2009 at 08:07 PM
Taking Chances SUCKED... I usually like Justin Long too..
Posted by: Jeffery McDowell | December 15, 2009 at 04:26 AM
Cruel Intentions 2. Worst. Movie. Ever.
Posted by: Tom | December 15, 2009 at 06:51 AM
While I have not rented a 1 star movie thus far, I have given just two movies a 1 star rating after renting: "Drag Me To Hell" and "Starship Troopers 3: Marauder".
To be honest, I knew going into 'Troopers' I wasn't going to be seeing an Oscar contender. It was just really sad for the amount of money and resources it had to work with and end up being on par quality-wise with a typical Sci-Fi Channel movie.
"Drag Me To Hell" was just a blindside of terrible. How in the world did that movie make it into theaters and avoid straight-to-DVD internal decision? It was just embarrassingly bad. I was actually angry for having wasted time seeing it.
Posted by: Smy | December 15, 2009 at 07:40 AM
Tom, I think cruel intentions 2 was way better then the first one people thought it suppose to be a drama but it was a comedy! but i agree with Smy, drag me to hell was just horrible.
Posted by: Ivy | December 15, 2009 at 10:13 AM
Catwoman and Batman & Robin. Movies from comic books can be dangerous in the wrong hands.
I'll never be able to purge the sound of Schwarzenegger's "evil laugh" from my memory banks.
Inexplicably, both of these movies have an average rating of about 3 stars on Netflix. I guess drug use must be on the rise again.
Posted by: byteme | December 15, 2009 at 12:59 PM
Drag Me To Hell is one the best reviewed movies of the year so I guess it just didn't click with you. It's great.
Seems I've only given one one star rating for a movie I rented from Netflix and that was The Dead Pit. I don't remember hating The Dead Pit that much.
Posted by: michael | December 15, 2009 at 04:31 PM
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3585/3528008206_b5c4325780_b.jpg
That's the worst we've seen at Famous Chicken Theatre. Center Stage 2: Turn It Up
Posted by: Tim S. | December 15, 2009 at 07:00 PM
Nosferatu. There are many different versions of this movie (since it was silent, at a time when the music was performed live). Netflix is using one with random classical music in the background! There are some excellent DVD's with the original music or new music scripted for the movie and there's really no excuse.
Posted by: netflix_luser | December 16, 2009 at 04:19 AM
Shoot 'Em Up. Boy, that was a plotless train wreck of a movie.
Posted by: S | December 16, 2009 at 07:48 PM
The Mist is terrible, it got 1 star from me.
Posted by: Mike | December 17, 2009 at 09:48 AM
The most recent bad movie I watched was "Spy High". Technically, I didn't rent this movie; I watched it via my Roku box. The dog was the best actor in the movie. This is a kids' movie and my kids usually put up with a high level of cheesiness, but this movie was even too much for them. We spent about 70 minutes of this 80-minute movie making fun of it.
Posted by: Dani in NC | December 18, 2009 at 07:23 PM
Cheerleader Ninjas. Don't let the title deceive you, it was not full of win.
Posted by: Rick | December 29, 2009 at 06:11 PM